OK, here is the original recipe:
Gyros
1 cup minced onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 lbs. ground pork or lamb
4 Tbs. lemon juice
1 tsp. dried oregano
1 tsp. ground cumin
1 cup cucumber, diced
1/2 cup non-fat plain yogurt
2 Tbs. mint, chopped (optional)
4 pitas
1 cup shredded lettuce
1 cup diced tomato
Feta cheese
Spray skillet with non-stick spray and add onion & garlic. Stirring constantly, cook on low heat until soft. Place in mixing bowl w/ meat, lemon juice, oregano & cumin, mix thoroughly. Shape into 4 patties. Place on rack of broiler and broil 3-5 minutes, each side until desired doneness. Combine cucumber, yogurt & mint in small bowl & mix. Cut around edge of pita and pull open to form pocket. Fill pocket w/ lettuce, tomato, 1 meat patty and cucumber/yogurt mixture. Top with feta cheese and enjoy!
Thank you for sharing, Amy!
Here is what I did: Gyros- Taco Style (Not your normal gyro)
1 cup minced onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 lbs. ground beef
4 Tbs. lemon juice
1 tsp. dried oregano
1 tsp. ground cumin
Pitas-from Costco
1 cup shredded lettuce
1 cup diced tomato
Feta cheese-from Costco
Cucumber Tzatziki sauce-from Costco
Spray skillet with non-stick spray and add onion & garlic. Stirring constantly, cook on low heat until soft. Place in mixing bowl w/ meat, lemon juice, oregano & cumin, mix thoroughly. I put it all back in the pan and cooked the meat “taco style.”
That is it! We warmed the pitas, added meat, feta, tzatziki sauce, lettuce & tomato! We love gyros, so nothing will ever be as good as buying a “normal” one, but this definitely satisfied my gyro craving!
Local friends: If you have never tried Z’s gyros in Bozeman, you are missing out! She is at the Bogart Farmer’s Market on Tuesdays, and sets up a small stand in the parking lot of Rocky Mtn Seafood Thurs & Fri during lunch.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
Not giving up what I want, for what I want right NOW
As many of you know, I teach Sunday school in our ward. (Youth, 12-13yr olds) I always seem to get more out of the lessons than they do. I was preparing a lesson on Self Mastery, (or self control) and I came across something that had a profound impact on me. It read: “Never give up what you want, for what you want right now.”
In the lesson it had to do with overcoming challenges and temptations in order to receive celestial glory. I can relate there as well, but in my case it is about weight.
Currently I am battling my weight again, and it is a battle I plan on winning. Losing weight is really hard for me. It is more of an emotional challenge than it is a physical challenge. I love to eat. It is that simple. It makes me feel good. And according to Oprah, I use food as a drug. “When you eat when you’re not hungry, you are using food as a drug.” That means I am a straight up druggie.
I eat when I’m sad.
I eat when I’m angry.
I eat when I’m happy.
I eat when I’m stressed.
You get the picture. Losing weight isn’t anything new to me. It seems like I have battled my weight my entire life. I have never been a large person, but large enough to make me incredible unhappy with the way I look. I think from the perspective of other people I have almost always been “average.” According to BMI charts I have spent a lot of time overweight. After I got married in 2002 and moved to Utah, I slowly started packing on the pounds. I have no idea what I weighed when I got married, but I do now that when we moved to Montana in 2004, I hit my highest weight of about 165. I know that isn’t very heavy, but I hated how I looked. I tried different diets that I couldn’t stick to because I love carbs and chocolate too much. They would last maybe a week, before I was eating our weekly pizza and Dairy Queen again. I finally hit rock bottom a year or so later and joined LA Weight loss. I had to go in for weigh-ins 3x a week and the pounds were actually coming off. I was feeling great. I still snuck cheat days in here and there, and actually stopped going in for my weigh-ins after about 3 months. I did not give up though. I kept all my meal plan books and kept at it, and just bought my own digital scale. I also was working out 5 or more times a week. I am proud to say that I made my goal by the time we went on vacation to Florida. (March 2007, I think) The day we left on the plane I weighed 125, and felt awesome. I stayed around 125-130 until I got pregnant with Ethan. Pregnancy took a toll on me, and at 12 weeks post partum I was back at 160. I was still breast feeding, so it didn’t take me long to lose it all again. (pumping actually, and producing enough for at least 3 kids) I started a weight loss competition at work in Feb of 2009, and was at 129 by Ethan’s birthday on August 15, 2009. I can brag now, and say that I did win that competition. The best part was- losing weight was a piece of cake compared to the 1st time. I didn’t step foot on one piece of exercise equipment other than our wii, and I pretty much cheated at least 3x a week. I almost feel like I cheated, because it was so easy.
This brings me to my current situation:
I got pregnant again shortly after losing all my baby weight, and the vicious cycle started again. Unfortunately this time, I don’t have breast-feeding on my side. Instead, I have frustration, anger, stress, sadness, ect. I’m so mad at myself for gaining so much weight in the short 20ish weeks I was pregnant. I had a rough 1st trimester, so when I felt good enough to eat, I ATE. I ate whatever and how much I felt like I deserved. Once I started feeling better, I ate even more. Mostly because I didn’t fear throwing it up. I wasn’t watching what I was eating to say the least.
I guess that would make this my 3rd official weight loss journey. I am now determined to win, again. It has been very frustrating. I have to work 10x harder, and the weight isn’t coming off as fast as it did the last time. I started this journey back at my much hated 160, and am slowly making progress. I have fallen off a few times since I started, but have lost about 12 lbs so far. My mii on the wii isn’t overweight anymore. YAY! (we have a wii fit that I weigh in on)
Every time I want to splurge on a big mac or a huge amount of chocolate, I now here that line from the lesson in my head…”Don’t give up what you want, for what you want right NOW.” I want so badly to be at a weight that I am happy with. It is now a daily battle trying to convince myself that eating that brownie or fries is just giving up what I want, for what I want at that moment. I am not giving that up.
To be continued…
In the lesson it had to do with overcoming challenges and temptations in order to receive celestial glory. I can relate there as well, but in my case it is about weight.
Currently I am battling my weight again, and it is a battle I plan on winning. Losing weight is really hard for me. It is more of an emotional challenge than it is a physical challenge. I love to eat. It is that simple. It makes me feel good. And according to Oprah, I use food as a drug. “When you eat when you’re not hungry, you are using food as a drug.” That means I am a straight up druggie.
I eat when I’m sad.
I eat when I’m angry.
I eat when I’m happy.
I eat when I’m stressed.
You get the picture. Losing weight isn’t anything new to me. It seems like I have battled my weight my entire life. I have never been a large person, but large enough to make me incredible unhappy with the way I look. I think from the perspective of other people I have almost always been “average.” According to BMI charts I have spent a lot of time overweight. After I got married in 2002 and moved to Utah, I slowly started packing on the pounds. I have no idea what I weighed when I got married, but I do now that when we moved to Montana in 2004, I hit my highest weight of about 165. I know that isn’t very heavy, but I hated how I looked. I tried different diets that I couldn’t stick to because I love carbs and chocolate too much. They would last maybe a week, before I was eating our weekly pizza and Dairy Queen again. I finally hit rock bottom a year or so later and joined LA Weight loss. I had to go in for weigh-ins 3x a week and the pounds were actually coming off. I was feeling great. I still snuck cheat days in here and there, and actually stopped going in for my weigh-ins after about 3 months. I did not give up though. I kept all my meal plan books and kept at it, and just bought my own digital scale. I also was working out 5 or more times a week. I am proud to say that I made my goal by the time we went on vacation to Florida. (March 2007, I think) The day we left on the plane I weighed 125, and felt awesome. I stayed around 125-130 until I got pregnant with Ethan. Pregnancy took a toll on me, and at 12 weeks post partum I was back at 160. I was still breast feeding, so it didn’t take me long to lose it all again. (pumping actually, and producing enough for at least 3 kids) I started a weight loss competition at work in Feb of 2009, and was at 129 by Ethan’s birthday on August 15, 2009. I can brag now, and say that I did win that competition. The best part was- losing weight was a piece of cake compared to the 1st time. I didn’t step foot on one piece of exercise equipment other than our wii, and I pretty much cheated at least 3x a week. I almost feel like I cheated, because it was so easy.
This brings me to my current situation:
I got pregnant again shortly after losing all my baby weight, and the vicious cycle started again. Unfortunately this time, I don’t have breast-feeding on my side. Instead, I have frustration, anger, stress, sadness, ect. I’m so mad at myself for gaining so much weight in the short 20ish weeks I was pregnant. I had a rough 1st trimester, so when I felt good enough to eat, I ATE. I ate whatever and how much I felt like I deserved. Once I started feeling better, I ate even more. Mostly because I didn’t fear throwing it up. I wasn’t watching what I was eating to say the least.
I guess that would make this my 3rd official weight loss journey. I am now determined to win, again. It has been very frustrating. I have to work 10x harder, and the weight isn’t coming off as fast as it did the last time. I started this journey back at my much hated 160, and am slowly making progress. I have fallen off a few times since I started, but have lost about 12 lbs so far. My mii on the wii isn’t overweight anymore. YAY! (we have a wii fit that I weigh in on)
Every time I want to splurge on a big mac or a huge amount of chocolate, I now here that line from the lesson in my head…”Don’t give up what you want, for what you want right NOW.” I want so badly to be at a weight that I am happy with. It is now a daily battle trying to convince myself that eating that brownie or fries is just giving up what I want, for what I want at that moment. I am not giving that up.
To be continued…
Friday, June 11, 2010
June 15, 2002
It all started when I was 16 years old. I was the teenager that came into the Hunter household wearing the tank tops and shorts that were too short. I was the one that nobody was sure of, because I was still in High school and Daniel was three years older than I was. Although everyone was kind to me, they often asked Daniel if he was sure that I was the one. Luckily for me, he was sure. (It didn't take them too long to realize I was ok.:)
Here we are, about to celebrate our 8th Wedding Anniversary. Which means, we have been together over 10 years. That's right, TEN years. Wow. That gives me goosebumps. Not only do I feel old, but amazingly blessed.
I often wonder what my life would be like if I didn't end up married to Daniel. I think of the friends I had before him, and the people I dated. It gets me all emotional to think of how hard my life would be if it wasn't for him. I probably wouldn't even be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Which is a huge thing for me. That has brought more joy and happiness to my life than ever imaginable. I also wonder, why me? Why am I so lucky to have everything. I have so much family that I see suffering in so many ways, and that would be me if it wasn't for Daniel. I just know it.
We have been through so much together, and I look forward to the many years to come.
Our marriage started in a tiny one room apartment in Provo, Utah. Daniel was in College, and working himself to exhaustion. I was working in retail, selling shoes. We moved on Back to Montana about 6 years ago. We are now homeowners, and Montana is a place we will probably always call home. I can only hope we are celebrating our
20th, 30th, and 40th Anniversaries here. One of the many positive things about getting married young: I will only be 58 when we celebrate our 40th Anniversary.
Here we are, about to celebrate our 8th Wedding Anniversary. Which means, we have been together over 10 years. That's right, TEN years. Wow. That gives me goosebumps. Not only do I feel old, but amazingly blessed.
I often wonder what my life would be like if I didn't end up married to Daniel. I think of the friends I had before him, and the people I dated. It gets me all emotional to think of how hard my life would be if it wasn't for him. I probably wouldn't even be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Which is a huge thing for me. That has brought more joy and happiness to my life than ever imaginable. I also wonder, why me? Why am I so lucky to have everything. I have so much family that I see suffering in so many ways, and that would be me if it wasn't for Daniel. I just know it.
We have been through so much together, and I look forward to the many years to come.
Our marriage started in a tiny one room apartment in Provo, Utah. Daniel was in College, and working himself to exhaustion. I was working in retail, selling shoes. We moved on Back to Montana about 6 years ago. We are now homeowners, and Montana is a place we will probably always call home. I can only hope we are celebrating our
20th, 30th, and 40th Anniversaries here. One of the many positive things about getting married young: I will only be 58 when we celebrate our 40th Anniversary.
Lightening McQueen-The Famous Race Car
Since Ethan was around 12 months old, he has had a thing for Lightening McQueen. (Or Queen, as he likes to say) As the months have passed, he has become more and more attached to him. He has at least 5 small Lightening McQueen cars, one large one, and all of his buddies. To name a few: Tow Mater, Doc, Sally, Wingo, Dj, Filmore, Sarge, Ramone, Guido, and that is about all I can think of. There is more though, I am sure of it! He can also tell us each of their names.
It is a rare occasion that he doesn't have McQueen/and or some other car in his hands. He carries them around all the time, even when we leave the house, to go for a walk or to play outside. He even insists on having them when he is sitting in his high chair. He will either eat with one hand, or park the cars in the cup holders.
On workdays, when it is time to go, he has to hurry and pick up the cars he wants to bring with him to Carol's house. Bedtime is especially interesting. It started innocently enough, with Grandma letting him bring one car to bed for his nap. Now, he brings as many as he can hold in his little hands. So it varies from 2-4 cars. Luckily, he is good at bedtime and just parks them by his pillow, and holds just one in his hand and goes to sleep. We have a video monitor, and I will check on him throughout the night, and sometimes he is sound asleep with a death grip on one of his cars.
Some kids have teddy bears, pacifiers, or blankets...mine chooses Lightening McQueen.
It is a rare occasion that he doesn't have McQueen/and or some other car in his hands. He carries them around all the time, even when we leave the house, to go for a walk or to play outside. He even insists on having them when he is sitting in his high chair. He will either eat with one hand, or park the cars in the cup holders.
On workdays, when it is time to go, he has to hurry and pick up the cars he wants to bring with him to Carol's house. Bedtime is especially interesting. It started innocently enough, with Grandma letting him bring one car to bed for his nap. Now, he brings as many as he can hold in his little hands. So it varies from 2-4 cars. Luckily, he is good at bedtime and just parks them by his pillow, and holds just one in his hand and goes to sleep. We have a video monitor, and I will check on him throughout the night, and sometimes he is sound asleep with a death grip on one of his cars.
Some kids have teddy bears, pacifiers, or blankets...mine chooses Lightening McQueen.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
One of the few things we are not sharing
I have gotten this question a lot: Did you name her?
I take no offense to it. I am a very open person and will share almost anything...but not that. Not sure why. I was just a few days away from 20 weeks, so we didn't get a death certificate, but did have her cremated and have her remains with us. The name would be unofficial anyway, I guess.
When the Schmidt family was visiting from Utah, I had Ryan give her a nickname. (For those who don't know Ryan...he gives nicknames to everyone. Mine is 48, and Daniel's is Cable TV, and I believe Ethan's is crunch and munch) He gave her the nickname of "Best Foods." So for now, we will call her Best Foods.
I take no offense to it. I am a very open person and will share almost anything...but not that. Not sure why. I was just a few days away from 20 weeks, so we didn't get a death certificate, but did have her cremated and have her remains with us. The name would be unofficial anyway, I guess.
When the Schmidt family was visiting from Utah, I had Ryan give her a nickname. (For those who don't know Ryan...he gives nicknames to everyone. Mine is 48, and Daniel's is Cable TV, and I believe Ethan's is crunch and munch) He gave her the nickname of "Best Foods." So for now, we will call her Best Foods.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Ethan amazes us on a daily basis
He is just sooo cute, and is always there to lift us up when we need it. He can make us laugh when we want to cry. He is learning sooooo much everyday. We had Daniel's sister Dawn and her awesome family here over memorial day and of course had loads of fun. The day they were getting ready to leave, Ryan (My autistic, OCD nephew that I LOVE LOVE LOVE. He is cooler than anyone I know.)was in the bathroom for the 100th time. So, Dawn was yelling at him to get out, and started counting sternly, "ONE...TWO......" and then we hear Ethan..TREE!!" It was so funny, but yet I was so proud. My heart melted a little!
After Ryan gets out of the bathroom: Dawn says, "Ryan, how many rolls of toilet paper have you used today?" Ryan: "THREE!" (It was only like 2 or 3:00 also:)
I love them!
I am currently trying to teach Ethan that he is going to be two. Just when I thought he got it, it went something like this:
Me: "Ethan, how old are you going to be?" Ethan: "TWO...(pause)...TREE"
At least he can count...a little bit.
After Ryan gets out of the bathroom: Dawn says, "Ryan, how many rolls of toilet paper have you used today?" Ryan: "THREE!" (It was only like 2 or 3:00 also:)
I love them!
I am currently trying to teach Ethan that he is going to be two. Just when I thought he got it, it went something like this:
Me: "Ethan, how old are you going to be?" Ethan: "TWO...(pause)...TREE"
At least he can count...a little bit.
My Journey through loss
As most everyone knows, the last few months have been very hard on us. I have put on a happy face and I really am coping well, but deep down there is a lot of pain we are still feeling on a daily basis. Losing a child during the second trimester of pregnancy isn't very common, and most people don't really know what it feels like. I had many people offer their condolences and share their experience of miscarriage. I appreciated all the kind words and prayers, but yet I still don't feel that anyone REALLY understands what it felt like. I then realized, nobody ever will. Which is fine, but there will always be that empty feeling in me knowing that I am the only one that will truly know what it felt like for ME.
April 12, 2010:
The day I found out that our world wasn't changing after all. I found out that I was pregnant on Christmas Eve 2009. I was shocked, but we were excited. The pregnancy was a lot harder than the last time. I had minor night sickness with Ethan, but I only threw up one time the whole pregnancy. This one, I threw up daily until I was about 15 weeks. At first it was in the morning, than at night. But there were times that I threw up in the middle of the day. It was just torture for me. And that is a sign of a "normal" pregnancy, so I never worried. I heard the baby's sweet heartbeat several times at my routine appts. It was always nice and strong. My Aril 12th appt came and I went in there like I did every other appt. Expecting to be in and out. I got there, and she went to check the hear beat and couldn't find it with the Doppler. She said not to worry, and that the baby was probably in an odd position. We went into the ultra sound room to take a look, and of course I was worried. My stomach was in knots. She started the ultra sound and didn't say anything for what felt like eternity. I then saw the look on her face. Another picture I can't get out of my head. She didn't even have to say anything. I don't even remember what she said. I just remember the look on her face. I laid there numb, while she went to get another Doctor to confirm it. I was so numb I couldn't even cry. She just sat there with me for a while and finally went over what we needed to do next. Because the baby was too big for a normal D&C, I had to be admitted into labor and delivery for an induction. She let me decide if I wanted to be admitted immediately or if I wanted to wait until that night or the next day. I chose the next day. I needed to get things straightened out for my work leave, get Ethan taken care of, and get my thoughts halfway straight. I left the doctor without even calling Daniel. I decided to just go to his work and see him in person.
Daniel took it a lot harder than I ever thought he would. Unfortunately I will never forget the look in his eyes, when I showed up at his work to tell him the news. At that moment, I'm pretty sure we were thinking the same thing...this has got to be a really bad dream. This isn't real...
Sadly, it was very real. So many things were running through my head, and I still think I was holding it together really well, because I was still in denial. It took me a few phone calls, and saying it out loud for me to realize that maybe it is real. Daniel still showed more emotion in the beginning than I did. I don't know if it is because I felt like I had to stay strong for him, or I just couldn't accept the reality of the situation.
My MIL showed up that night to care for Ethan while I was in the hospital. We got to Labor and Delivery at 7AM the next morning. I got checked in, and the induction started at about 8:30. It was a slow process, and time was dragging by. I wanted nothing more than to be in and out of there. Being in that L&D room brought back sweet memories, but at the same time, it was horribly painful knowing that we were leaving empty handed. I started feeling some pain at about 4:00. Up until that point it was just minor cramping. They kept telling me, that with the induction drug they use, the pain comes on fast and strong. And the amount of pain will be similar to what I felt with Ethan. Other than the pushing part will be cake compared to a full term baby. At about 4:15, I felt a gush of water. My water broke. I was screaming hysterically, mostly because I was scared. The nurse came in, and then quickly called the Doctor. It was time. Time to delivery my sweet baby girl. I was shaking uncontrollably. They kept offering me something for the pain, so I would calm down. I refused. I wanted to feel the pain. This whole time, I really was blaming myself. What had I done wrong? It had to have been something that I did. Although I had been told numerous times, it was not my fault. I knew it wasn't, but yet I couldn't stop blaming myself. If that makes any sense! I finally got the urge to push at about 4:30and it was all over. I was no longer pregnant. Done. My eyes remained closed this entire time. I was crying so hard I could breath. I was afraid to see my dead baby. The minute the baby came out was one of the moments I will never forge
t. I immediately heard the Doctor say, "It's a chromosomal problem. I can see it. Shauna, there was NOTHING you could have done differently." As I was hysterical, and with Daniel holding my hand, oddly enough we felt peace. Heavenly Father heard our cries, and felt our pain. He also saved our sweet baby a lifetime of pain and suffering. I did later choose to hold and see her, and a photographer did take photos of her all wrapped up in a blanket. Something I think we will cherish someday.
April 12, 2010:
The day I found out that our world wasn't changing after all. I found out that I was pregnant on Christmas Eve 2009. I was shocked, but we were excited. The pregnancy was a lot harder than the last time. I had minor night sickness with Ethan, but I only threw up one time the whole pregnancy. This one, I threw up daily until I was about 15 weeks. At first it was in the morning, than at night. But there were times that I threw up in the middle of the day. It was just torture for me. And that is a sign of a "normal" pregnancy, so I never worried. I heard the baby's sweet heartbeat several times at my routine appts. It was always nice and strong. My Aril 12th appt came and I went in there like I did every other appt. Expecting to be in and out. I got there, and she went to check the hear beat and couldn't find it with the Doppler. She said not to worry, and that the baby was probably in an odd position. We went into the ultra sound room to take a look, and of course I was worried. My stomach was in knots. She started the ultra sound and didn't say anything for what felt like eternity. I then saw the look on her face. Another picture I can't get out of my head. She didn't even have to say anything. I don't even remember what she said. I just remember the look on her face. I laid there numb, while she went to get another Doctor to confirm it. I was so numb I couldn't even cry. She just sat there with me for a while and finally went over what we needed to do next. Because the baby was too big for a normal D&C, I had to be admitted into labor and delivery for an induction. She let me decide if I wanted to be admitted immediately or if I wanted to wait until that night or the next day. I chose the next day. I needed to get things straightened out for my work leave, get Ethan taken care of, and get my thoughts halfway straight. I left the doctor without even calling Daniel. I decided to just go to his work and see him in person.
Daniel took it a lot harder than I ever thought he would. Unfortunately I will never forget the look in his eyes, when I showed up at his work to tell him the news. At that moment, I'm pretty sure we were thinking the same thing...this has got to be a really bad dream. This isn't real...
Sadly, it was very real. So many things were running through my head, and I still think I was holding it together really well, because I was still in denial. It took me a few phone calls, and saying it out loud for me to realize that maybe it is real. Daniel still showed more emotion in the beginning than I did. I don't know if it is because I felt like I had to stay strong for him, or I just couldn't accept the reality of the situation.
My MIL showed up that night to care for Ethan while I was in the hospital. We got to Labor and Delivery at 7AM the next morning. I got checked in, and the induction started at about 8:30. It was a slow process, and time was dragging by. I wanted nothing more than to be in and out of there. Being in that L&D room brought back sweet memories, but at the same time, it was horribly painful knowing that we were leaving empty handed. I started feeling some pain at about 4:00. Up until that point it was just minor cramping. They kept telling me, that with the induction drug they use, the pain comes on fast and strong. And the amount of pain will be similar to what I felt with Ethan. Other than the pushing part will be cake compared to a full term baby. At about 4:15, I felt a gush of water. My water broke. I was screaming hysterically, mostly because I was scared. The nurse came in, and then quickly called the Doctor. It was time. Time to delivery my sweet baby girl. I was shaking uncontrollably. They kept offering me something for the pain, so I would calm down. I refused. I wanted to feel the pain. This whole time, I really was blaming myself. What had I done wrong? It had to have been something that I did. Although I had been told numerous times, it was not my fault. I knew it wasn't, but yet I couldn't stop blaming myself. If that makes any sense! I finally got the urge to push at about 4:30and it was all over. I was no longer pregnant. Done. My eyes remained closed this entire time. I was crying so hard I could breath. I was afraid to see my dead baby. The minute the baby came out was one of the moments I will never forge
t. I immediately heard the Doctor say, "It's a chromosomal problem. I can see it. Shauna, there was NOTHING you could have done differently." As I was hysterical, and with Daniel holding my hand, oddly enough we felt peace. Heavenly Father heard our cries, and felt our pain. He also saved our sweet baby a lifetime of pain and suffering. I did later choose to hold and see her, and a photographer did take photos of her all wrapped up in a blanket. Something I think we will cherish someday.
The Diagnosis
Our baby girl was sent to a children's hospital for genetic testing to see what birth defect took her life. Several weeks later, we found out that it was Trisomy 21.(Down Syndrome) Although, that is not what we wanted to hear, we were grateful to finally have an answer. We were warned that there was a good possibility we wouldn't ever have a definite answer.
My Doctor suggested that Daniel and I get tested to see if one of us passed it on. Although it is more likely that it was just "bad luck" and something that probably won't happen again. We thought about it, but soon came to the conclusion that we aren't going to waste the time and money to get our blood tested. Why? It won't change anything. If we did pass it on, there is a chance it might happen again. If Heavenly Father wants to bless us with a special needs baby, we can accept that. I know it wouldn't be easy, but there is no doubt in our minds we would love the child just as much as we love Ethan.
After all is said and done, I am grateful for this trial we have had in our life. Although it isn't something I would wish upon my worst enemy, it has strengthened our marriage, our testimonies of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and has helped us appreciate what we DO have. I know without a doubt that we are given trials in life because Heavenly Father loves us, not because he wants to see us suffer. I am so grateful for an eternal marriage and my eternal family. I can't wait to meet that sweet spirit that has caused us so much grief....and throwing up. :)
There are still times when I am bitter and have a moment of "this isn't fair!!" It is getting easier day by day, but is something that will never be forgotten.
My Doctor suggested that Daniel and I get tested to see if one of us passed it on. Although it is more likely that it was just "bad luck" and something that probably won't happen again. We thought about it, but soon came to the conclusion that we aren't going to waste the time and money to get our blood tested. Why? It won't change anything. If we did pass it on, there is a chance it might happen again. If Heavenly Father wants to bless us with a special needs baby, we can accept that. I know it wouldn't be easy, but there is no doubt in our minds we would love the child just as much as we love Ethan.
After all is said and done, I am grateful for this trial we have had in our life. Although it isn't something I would wish upon my worst enemy, it has strengthened our marriage, our testimonies of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and has helped us appreciate what we DO have. I know without a doubt that we are given trials in life because Heavenly Father loves us, not because he wants to see us suffer. I am so grateful for an eternal marriage and my eternal family. I can't wait to meet that sweet spirit that has caused us so much grief....and throwing up. :)
There are still times when I am bitter and have a moment of "this isn't fair!!" It is getting easier day by day, but is something that will never be forgotten.
I am FINALLY joining the blogging world!
Just a warning though...my posts will be as scattered as my life! Most of my posts will be rushed, as I don't have a lot of time to sit on the computer. But, with Ethan growing and so many things happening, I want to keep family and friends informed on what is going on with us!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)