In sickness AND health...

I think I remember hearing something of that sort when we got married. The thing is, I married a man who almost never is sick. On the rare occasion he is, it is very short lived and has been able to take care of himself.

We have had quite an interesting few weeks. A lot of things have gotten me really down. I will start from the beginning. Ethan has needed his tonsils out for quite a while now. This winter has been hard. It is a very rare occasion when there is a full nights rest in our house. Not to mention the colds that quickly turn into ear infections. He was originally scheduled March 30th. That is if he was not sick. (not even a sniffle) I was really stressing out about it because he is in daycare one day a week and a home care another few days. I was stressing because if he missed that appt, they are scheduled over a month out so May would be our last option before the baby comes. We need it done before then. The thought of it not happening again in May makes me feel ill. As the date approaches, we are praying like crazy for him to get over the cold he is fighting. We had family and friends praying with us and his name was even put in the temple. He had even gotten a blessing. I was feeling pretty confident that this was going to happen and our testimony of prayer and the priesthood was going to grow enormously. Especially since his nose stopped running and in the days before surgery he seemed to be fine! What a relief! Then comes the afternoon before surgery....
It was about 3:00 pm and he had diarrhea. I call the Dr in a panic to see if his surgery could still go on, but deep down I knew what this meant. We jumped in the car and drove to the Dr and got him checked out. Everything great until he looked in his throat. His tonsils were covered in white spots which means he had an active infection. They tested for strep and came to the conclusion that is was just another viral infection. Probably from the cold he just got over. Those nasty tonsils hadn't caught up with the fact that the cold was now gone. Appointment canceled. They will not operate on tonsils with an active infection. There were a lot of tears that night. He was and still is cold-free thankfully. I do understand them wanting to be safe. Especially since he is so young, but it still was very upsetting for us.

Rescheduling: This is still 3/29, the day it was canceled.

They couldn't get us in until May 1st. Which gives him enough time to be well and get sick again right before surgery. I took the appt and just hoped for the best. I was (we both were) wondering why, of all unanswered prayers and blessings did we have one that affects the health of our poor miserable 2 yr old?? We knew it obviously "wasn't meant to be." But that didn't seem like enough. It still had me really down. Wrong attitude, I know.
The next day the Dr calls to tell me they had a cancellation and can get him in April 15th. I took the appointment hoping that was the right choice. It wasn't, but we'll get to that.

Now-Fast forward to March 31st. ONE day after his surgery was originally suppose to happen. Daniel suddenly starts experiencing a lot of pain. Toughs through it until about 4/2, when he realizes something is wrong and he needs a Doctor and a blessing. Too late for the Doctor because he refused to go to the ER, so he gets a blessing that night. The next morning he hobbles to the Doctor in severe pain. Turns out it was something that could have been rather serious had he not gotten it taken care of. In the words of my husband, "I read online that they can be fatal." He is so cute doing his online research. But true, if left untreated it could have caused serious infection and in some cases it could have been fatal. Luckily his was caught fairly early, and wasn't nearly as bad as it could've been. After a very painful little $720 procedure at the Dr's office he comes home pretty cripple and on vicodin and 2 other medications. (Thank you insurance for helping with 70%!!) We weren't expecting what a tough week this would turn out to be. It is now Thursday, and we are seeing the light at the end of the dark tunnel the past few days has been. He is actuall worked 3 hours today to see if he could do it, AND is off of vicodin. He was worried that after taking it round the clock for a few days that his body would become addicted to it. Weird thing is, when he stopped taking it all of a sudden, he did get the sweats, which is one of the symptoms. No wonder there are so many people addicted to pain pills. Those things are bad.

So, how hard have the past few days been?

I have been utterly exhausted and tried not to feel too sorry for myself because Daniel was really the one suffering. He only hobbled out of bed to use the bathroom. And even that was tough for him. He depended on me for everything you could imagine. I had to make sure he had enough water and snacks by the bed, and had to make and bring every meal to him. Granted this was really only for about 4 days. But remember-I am still working full time and taking care of Ethan completely by myself. Including bedtime which is the hardest part of the day. The mornings were spent getting Ethan & I ready and fed, and making sure Daniel was fed and ok until I could get home at 11:00 for lunch and anything else he may need. After work was scrambling to make something for dinner. Which is later than usual, because I am not usually the one picking up Ethan. By the time that was done it was bedtime. And poor little guy needs so much attention after work. With Dad down and me running 100 MPH, it was tough on him too. I am so used to Daniel already being home with Ethan and having dinner started, nights were extra difficult. Remember I am still pregnant, extremely tired and really emotional lately. Of course I always have a variety of my own pregnancy issues. Ones that I haven't even had time to worry about.
I always thought I knew that Daniel did a lot, but after being on my own a few days really made me realize how he makes my life easier. And I always have a variety of my own pregnancy issues.

Ok, so what is the point of all this? I promise I didn't ramble on for nothing. Sunday night, after all had mostly gone down, I was crying my eyes out to my poor crippled husband. I just couldn't believe all the things that had happened in a 30 day period. (Again, if I sound dramatic-I will blame the pregnancy)

Financial things:
Having to pre-pay for a portion of Ethan's surgery (Even with insurance! Crazy people.)
needing brake work on the car, belts and other misc things
paying for a new water heater/labor, ect
Daniel's sudden medical expenses, and lost wages to top everything off
Having to pay for daycare with lost wages and him being home was a major bummer. There is no way he could've cared for Ethan.

And of course the things that had me really down:

Ethan's surgery being canceled...twice. Yep, the 4/15 appointment had to be canceled due to Daniel's condition and missing too much work in one month.
Daniel's issue of course, and the pain and exhaustion that caused him and me. (mostly him) Both of them had been given a blessing, and I know blessings don't guarantee perfect healing or what you need right then. Just like paying tithing doesn't guarantee things won't be hard. I was in the wrong state of mind and just frustrated and trying to understand. I know we aren't being punished, but in my frustrations it felt that way....for a short time.

As I was losing it, all he could say was, "Don't you realize why Ethan's surgery had to be canceled?" And then it clicked. Had Ethan had his surgery when first scheduled, Ethan would have been in the first day or 2 of recovery when Daniel went down. Doesn't sound like a big deal, but it is. I firmly believe we are not given more than we can handle, and I KNOW I couldn't have taken care of Ethan while his little body struggles with the pains of a tonsillectomy/adenoidectomy surgery AND have Daniel who needed so much and to go back and forth to the Doctor so many times when he couldn't drive.
Sounds crazy, but that would've been more than I can handle. I don't do well when Ethan is sick in general. After surgery will be extra difficult even with help. I also don't deal with stress well. My Dr would have me admitted for my blood pressure if she knew I was super stressed. My blood pressure is already a concern and it goes way up when I worry and stress.

So moral of the story is, although we've had a lot of unanswered prayers...or prayers answered in a way not expected we at least know we aren't being ignored. This has been an eye opening and learning experience for us. We have learned more than I will get into here. We weren't being punished for anything, but we do need to make improvements and changes in a lot of aspects of our lives. I am just glad the trials we have had have been so short lived. We are really blessed.

It's funny that during our many little trials like this I think things are SO hard and then afterwards...like now, I think "Ok, that wasn't so bad." Well, Daniel may have a different answer. It probably was that bad for him. :)

And if you're wondering...we are back on for Ethan's surgery May 5th. Still need prayers about that one. I really need a healthy boy before he becomes a big brother!

Finally-the end. For now, anyway.